Hey you...it's been a while, eh? I was still trying to weigh what to do with this place, so I figured I'd ramble in here for a bit.

Do you remember Brett? He's the LARPer who's been living with me since April of last year. If you've not been giving my livejournal a gander, then you prolly don't know that he's been without work since Thanksgiving of last year. Which means I've been the sole support for both of us up to now.

I want to start by saying that I don't have a problem with helping someone I care for. I've helped pay for things more than some really deserved. It's when the feelings of being taken advantage of come into play that I start really wondering where the hell to draw my line. And Brett has had me there for a long time now.

I'm currently paying over $1000 in rent a month. I pay for all our food, car gas, electricty, phone, plus the two perks of cable and broadband. I shouldn't have to drop the perks because Brett refuses to REALLY look for work. Many have said I should just kick him out. And yet...something in the back of my mind says, "Wait...wait just a little longer..."

I don't know what I'm waiting for. Even though I'd be glad if he had a job and was helping me financially, it's been clear that ours is not a love meant to end in marriage, though I think Brett continues to delude himself. But I do love and care for him. Is there any other explanation for my wanting to help him, in spite of the suffering? There's always plain insanity, I suppose...

>.>

Anyway, he's treading on my thin ice right now. He's lost his footing a few times already... I don't know how much longer I can hold together...

I'm focusing on my tasks for Anime Expo. It's one of my few lights right now...